What do I do? Loving him feels bad & Not loving him feels worse....
Lately I have many issues about my boyfriend... the things he does, how he is,
etc . He made me so annoyed that I actually told him I don't want to be with him anymore & that he should go. He got angry and went to work but when he came home he acted like nothing happened. He didn't think I was serious. He just tries to kiss me and everything but I've been avoiding being close with him, he thinks because I am mad at him for his drunken behaviour but the truth is that it's more than that... but I hate the depressing feeling of witholding affection and not loving him. We live together & he didn't think I was serious about ending it and I just can't tell him again. I can't be mean like that because it hurts & it's hard.. i love him.. so i just ignore it again...
and I don't know why I feel like this or what to do... we have been together for 18 months. It depresses me that I feel this way and sometimes I think it's easier to just not think so much... if I just decide to be happy & go with it. But whenever he does something stupid I get angry and want to end it but then later he acts loving to me and sad saying he is sad that i don't love him anymore and it breaks my heart and I just can't do anything... so i tell him i do love you... but i don't know if i really do... i don't know what to do :( everything just feels sad...
